Squirrel Tracks of the Apocalypse

Mayan apocalypse proof end of the world squirrels

Well, I’m not bummed out that we’re all still here.

I’m disappointed, however, that I no longer get to end my sentences with “…of the Apocalypse.” Last night, for example, as a storm rolled into Coshocton and high winds were threatening this little shanty we’re living in, I got to say “Here it is, the snowstorm of the apocalypse.”

In the weeks leading up to today, I had fun with things like “the new comet of the apocalypse,” “the chupacabra of the apocalypse,” “the North Korean pocket rocket of the apocalypse,” and “the trapped kittens of the apocalypse.”

I’m particularly proud of this last one, because I got to use it many times, like “Teddy, the trapped kitten of the apocalypse,” “the weird scratching trapped kitten of the apocalypse,” and of course, and especially, “Abe, the conveniently marketable kitten trapped in the Abe Lincoln statue…of the apocalypse.

So when I woke this morning and realized I was still alive (unless I’m in some existential otherness right now, in which case Hello? HELLO? HelloooOOOOOOOO…… EchoEchoEchoEcho…) I thought “Dang it! I don’t know any other jokes!”

Then I realized, Hey, it’s still December 21st. Surely I can milk this one last time?

Thus I give you (isn’t it great to just pop out a “thus” once in awhile?)…the Squirrel Tracks of the Apocalypse.

Mayan apocalypse proof squirrels birds end of world
Further proof in the abandoned sunflower seed and the coming together of bird and squirrel. Wait…. am I even still here typing this? What’s happening right now?

Did anyone else just hear mewing…?

Love, Marla

P.S. “Kitten trapped in shoebox….of the apocalypse” (I smell manmade disaster here).


6 thoughts on “Squirrel Tracks of the Apocalypse

  1. Really have nothing to comment on today, just wanted to send one last reply (in case of the apocalypse). So, “hello” or “goodbye” whichever the case may be. Not certain, but pretty sure I’ll see you on the other side! We’ll probably both be waiting in the same line! 😉
    Love you sis.

    1. Hahaha. “hello” or “goodbye” – too cute, brother.
      Did your wife tell you I’m stopping by tomorrow to drop off some presents? Just call me Marla Claus (after all, my belly still jiggles like a bowl full of jelly…)

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