When “All or Nothing” is Everything
I am a sugar addict. And it just isn’t funny anymore.
Am I the only one getting sick and tired of being told “everything in moderation?” I think balance and moderation are beautiful ideals, but they just don’t work for every person or every situation.
In other words, let’s apply that moderation principle in moderation, ‘mkay? For example, I was addicted to nicotine. I was a heavy smoker for about ten years. I mean heavy. Like so many of my addictions, I couldn’t stop increasing my intake until finally, at 3 packs a day, after having tried so many pills and patches, gums and decreases, my only solution was to quit cold turkey.
I was at all, and my only solution was nothing. I know, like an alcoholic knows he can’t have another drink, that one hit will addict me again. For many “normal” people, moderation works. For those of us prone to chemical dependency, “nothing” seems to be our only salvation. There are few experts who would disagree that as an addict, I should completely avoid cigarettes, drugs and alcohol. So why is it so extreme to look at caffeine and sugar from the same point of view?
As I type this, I’m on my second grande latte of the morning. I’m currently on a caffeine upswing. Caffeine is something I’m not really supposed to have anyway. I have PACs, little extra beats that, when mixed with caffeine, put me in constant palpitations. It feels constantly, like my heart is going to explode. So why not just cut back? Good question. I have spent the last fifteen years with therapists trying to “teach” me moderation, and it just doesn’t work for me. The only thing that has, is to stop completely.
I had a lot of support with cigarettes and moderate support with alcohol, but people tend to think you’re being dramatic if you need to completely eliminate caffeine or sugar from your life…especially sugar. Part of it is that many of those “normal” brain people, who don’t have addictive personalities, don’t see most substances as a threat. They therefore, unintentionally, become enablers to those of us who have come to realize that for our survival, we need to be in “nothing” mode.
I don’t have answers to any of this, and today’s post is from my Android phone as I begrudgingly sit in Monro muffler, waiting for the misogynistic attendant to see about my “new” car, Henry the Jeep (I’ll introduce you to him soon).
What do you think about “all or nothing?”
Why does it only apply to certain addictions?
Have any of my readers gone “nothing” on something as pervasive as sugar? How is that even done? What makes it “stick?”
I think a lot about being a nonsmoker now and it’s hard to believe I smoked so much for so long. But sitting on this end of the sugar shack (couldn’t resist) I can’t imagine a life without sugar.
Looking forward to ALL your opinions, as usual.