The Brandon Roast…Because You Only Turn 30 Once!
My nephew turns 30 today…THIRTY!! I thought today’s post would be the perfect time to write him a letter, and maybe roast him just a teensy bit by sharing some photos he’s going to kill me for…
I was thirteen when you were born.
I remember how excited I was. I was the youngest in my family, and always wanted a little brother or sister. I loved babysitting and learned how to change diapers, give baths and all the duties of taking care of a baby. You had really smelly diapers. I thought “Dear God, do all babies have such stinky shit?” (Yes. Yes, they do.)
I also owned my own camera by then. I had won it a year or two earlier selling magazines for school and every time I got money for film or developing, I was taking photos of you and, two years later, your sister, Brianna.
The best memories of my teenage years and early college are of babysitting you both.
We would reenact scenes from Adventures in Babysitting and play dressup and watch Smurfs together and when Kurt and I got married, you and your sister were the ringbearers in our wedding.
We have gone on roadtrips together and wherever we live, you are our most frequent visitor.
We even got to meet Jay Leno together on one of your visits.
We even survived Death Valley together…
…and you rivaled my tree-hugging penchant with your own brand of awesome craziness…
(and we both know you can build a better rockpile 😉 )
You have also taken the brunt of several of my mooning attempts and survived burned-out retinas in the process.
Thirty is just the beginning, my B to the RAN to the D-O-N, and I look forward to more adventures together for the next fifty-eight years (although perhaps when I’m 101 our adventure will be you learning how to change my diaper – how’s that for burning the retina of your imagination?)
I love you forever,